


I had been lost to you, your love is sunlight

by whenever_you_are_ready_spock



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Bickering, Emotions, F/F, Fights, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, rey and rose ship it, they are just an old married couple wow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:27:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22585603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whenever_you_are_ready_spock/pseuds/whenever_you_are_ready_spock
Summary: Set after TROS.„Rey is coming back“. Finn looks up from where he is crouched over a pile of papers and maps; a big grin splattered across his lips.“Rey”, he says before he jumps up and runs towards the landing hanger; Poe sighs before he folds the map in front of him and follows Finn – they are in the middle of locating allies and Poe has not been doing all too well lately.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn, Rey/Rose Tico
Comments: 8
Kudos: 99





	I had been lost to you, your love is sunlight

**Author's Note:**

> wuh. this is just one big rant about bickering boyfriends. hope you enjoy it.

„Rey is coming back“

Finn looks up from where he is crouched over a pile of papers and maps; a big grin splattered across his lips.

“Rey”, he says before he jumps up and runs towards the landing hanger; Poe sighs before he folds the map in front of him and follows Finn – they are in the middle of locating allies and Poe has not been doing all too well lately.

The flacon has already landed when the two generals approach the landing hanger; Finn bites his lip in excitement as he watches Rey step out of the spacecraft.

“Rey!”, he screams and waves his arm.

“Finn!”, Rey smiles brightly and runs over; meeting a running Finn halfway.

They embrace each other; Finn’s smile radiant and Rey is pressing her fingers into Finn’s shoulders – she has missed him more than the world; his presence immediately calming her; she is home.

Poe jogs up to them; an easy grin on his lips.

“How is my droid doing?”, he asks as soon as Rey lets Finn go and faces him.

“Hello to you too”, Rey says and Poe huffs out a laugh before he hugs her as well. He has missed her just as much – Rey is the midpoint of their organisation now - Rey is and has ever been the heart of the Resistance.

“BB8 is doing just fine – seems like he enjoys adventuring without being treated like a baby quite a lot”, she grins.

“That’s what he tells you – I am pretty sure I get another story”, Poe shrugs his shoulders before he crouches down and rubs the side of his spherical friend, “Isn’t that so, buddy?”

BB8 beeps and Rey laughs loudly. Finn just raises his eyebrows – he really needs to learn this kriffin language soon.

“Traitor”, Poe mumbles and Rey hugs Finn again – the two of them belonging together – their hearts full.

Poe is crouching next to his droid; watching his two friends hug intensely. He swallows hard; his heart flutters. Poe waves at the rest of the team – he helps them unload the Falcon while Finn and Rey blabber away – both cannot seem to stop talking in each other’s presence.

Rey has brought home some crucial information and Poe has organized a meeting to compare their findings; to locate their next point of rescue or attack.

Rey shows them old maps; presents the traces of the last First Order affiliates she has found in their area.

“I think it should not be too difficult to locate them; they have been messy; lots of traces left. I felt their fear”, she concludes and smiles at Poe who is standing next to her; arms crossed across his chest; a confident look on his face.

“That’s excellent news, Rey. Thank you”

Rey winks at him before she sits down again – Finn on her one side, Rose on the other. Finn leans over to her and whispers something in her ear; Rey grabs Finn’s hand and smiles happily.

Poe clears his throat and steps into the middle of the room, switching a few buttons before a giant holo map appears around them.

“Finn has started to trace back some old patterns of the First Order – we have detected a few focal points where they used to gather and regroup. We thought it would be most effective to catch them when they are the weakest. I know it is not ideal – we are not fully recovered ourselves but now is the time to chase them and end this for good”

A few red dots surround their heads on the map – the number of First Order alliances are small but not to be taken lightly. Poe stops for a moment; Finn is still whispering with Rey – they are in their own world and Poe rubs his neck before he starts to explain the finer details of their plan.

“In the end, we have decided to send an X-Wing squad first – it is safer to check the situation out without own eyes before we step into a trap. I will lead my team; Finn will control the backup group. We will explain the details of those plans with the people involved. So, Finn will grab his people and guide you through the plan we came up with”

Some people are already getting up, but Finn is more than caught up chatting with Rey – their eyes are concentrated on each other – the world around them seemingly unnecessary and Poe feels the anger bubble up inside his chest.

“Finn”, Poe says firmly, and Finn’s head shoots up and his eyes find his, “Can you decide on your groups and explain their position to them?”

Finn thinks for a moment before he looks back to Rey. “How about we eat before we discuss further details. Rey has just returned, and I am sure everyone would love to hear some of her stories”

Poe clenches his chin and his heartbeat is pulsing in his neck.

“I just think it would be practical now that everyone is already gathered up here”

There is some awkward shuffling around of everyone – Rose is throwing a pleading look to Finn and Poe – they usually get along seamlessly but once they disagree it often escalates dramatically.

“Poe. I think it is too late already. The mission is only in a couple of days – I think we could all use a good night’s sleep”

“This is important, okay?!”, Poe bites out and Finn looks taken aback for a moment before he turns fully towards Poe now and raises his eyebrows.

“Getting rest is important too – I know that you didn’t sleep again last night. You could do with a break as well”, Finn says, and Poe’s face hardens up before he switches off the holo map and storms off.

“Great”, Finn mumbles before he faces Rey and squeezes her hand, “I will be right back”

“Drama queen”, Rey huffs out and Finn nods before he gets up and jogs after Poe.

“Poe, wait”, he screams as he tries to catch up with the man before him.

“Poe!”, he screams again and runs along the corridor, catching up with a tensed-up Poe who still walks towards the exit of the base.

“Hey, stop, okay. Can I talk to you?”

“Leave me alone, okay. I need a minute”, Poe barks and Finn’s eyebrows draw together – Poe’s voice is strained and tight. Finn hasn’t heard him like that in quite a while.

“Poe. Let’s talk about this okay?”, Finn tries again and he tries to grab Poe’s hand but the pilot rips it away and crosses his arms in front of him.

“Don’t be like that”, Finn huffs.

“Don’t be like that!? Are you serious?! You were the one that undermined my authority!”, Poe grows then, and Finn feels the anger grows inside of his stomach as well as he rounds around Poe and stands in front of him.

“They are your friends, Poe. Every single one of those people knows that this is not easy. I am sorry that I told them that you are stressed but it’s the truth”, Finn shouts and Poe stares at him for a long moment.

“The Resistance needs someone to lead them; I didn’t want this, okay? But someone has to do it. And if they all know that I am just as afraid as them it will not work”

“You are not alone in this”, Finn grows and steps closer to Poe who stares up at him, “We are Co-Generals. Or have you forgotten about that?”

“I am not the one who has forgotten that”, Poe bites back and pushes past Finn, storming towards the exit again.

“What in the force are you talking about”, Finn screams and Poe turns around, a few meters between them now, “I am there every single second. I am next to you for every little decision. I care about this. I care about you”, Finn’s voice gets rough at the end. His heart beats heavily in his chest.

“Oh, do you? To me it seems as if this all doesn’t mean anything anymore as soon as Rey is in the picture again”, Poe screams and his chest is heaving violently, and Finn is shocked for a moment. They stare at each other silently before Finn shakes his head.

“What does Rey have to do with this now?”, he shouts and Poe rolls his eyes visibly.

“You haven’t even listened to on word I said during the council. You were too busy chatting away with Rey”, he shouts and there is so much hurt in his eyes and Finn doesn’t understand it.

“I am sorry, okay? She just came home, and we didn’t have a lot of time to call while she was away. I missed her”, Finn defends himself and he feels tears prickling in his eyes. He knows that Poe has never warmed up to Rey as much as he has hoped to but they usually get along fine enough. “I thought you would want to catch up with her as well”, he says – his voice hoarse.

“I do, for kriffs sake. I do. But there are more important things okay? Your little gatherings and chit chats can wait until we are safe”, Poe shouts and he looks as defeated as Finn feels. His cheeks red and his eyes glassy.

“What did she ever do to you, hm? Why are you so cruel towards us?”

“Oh, it’s _us_ now, is it?”, Poe shouts and throws his hands in the air while he shakes his head.

“We are friends!”, Finn yells and Poe nods, a pained smile on his features.

“Of course you are”, he huffs out a wet laugh and Finn’s head pulses with his heartbeat.

“I don’t understand what your problem is”, he says and takes a step towards Poe. The sheer anger and pain are thick between them – their eyes never leaving the gaze of the other.

“Forget it, okay”, Poe shouts and rubs furiously over his eyes as Finn steps closer.

“Poe, you have to talk to me, or this is not going to work out”, Finn grows annoyed.

“You two clearly have a thing and I am not part of that and that is okay. I thought we… forget it. Okay”, Poe says – his voice strained and Finn steps closer again.

“No, Poe! You cannot just keep telling me to forget it. You cannot keep secrets and expect me to figure shit out”

“Oh that is rich coming from you”, Poe laughs; Finn is close enough to see the tears in Poe’s eyes.

“What is your problem?! I never keep anything from you!”, Finn shouts and it echoes in the hallway.

“Oh really? So what did you tell Rey then, hm? What did you have to tell Rey that I wasn’t allowed to hear?”

Finn stares at Poe; stares at his glassy brown eyes; his parted lips; his exhaustion radiating right off him. He feels his pain. He feels his anger. He feels his love.

“How are you still hung up about that?! It wasn’t important okay?”, Finn presses through his teeth and Poe shakes his head.

“Seemed important back then”, he shouts and Finn rolls his eyes.

“Poe. Please. It’s not important”, Finn grows and Poe finally breaks their eye contact as his gaze falls to the ceiling above them.

“I get it”, Poe says and Finn stares at him; watches his every move.

“What do you get? Cause I am clearly lost here!”, Finn yells and Poe looks back at him; tears spilling over his cheeks now.

“It doesn’t matter. Keep your secret with her but I figured it out”, Poe cries before he turns around; about to walk away again.

“Poe”, Finn grabs Poe’s hand and spins him back around.

**“I am force sensitive”**   
**“I know that you love her”**

Both are silent for a heartbeat; Poe’s eyes wide; Finn’s heart nearly shattering his chest.

**“What?”**   
**“What?”**

Finn’s hand is still wrapped around Poe’s hand; their skin hot; Poe’s presence nearly suffocating.

“I am force sensitive”, Finn says again, his voice barely audible.

Poe’s eyes are wider even; his mouth is open. There are still tears spilling over the edge of his eyes.

“I wanted to tell Rey first. I was so afraid. I have no idea what to do and she could help me. I didn’t want to keep it from you, Poe. I am sorry. I would have told you soon but I want to know what this is exactly before I tell everyone”

Poe’s expression doesn’t change a lot; he seems frozen into place; only the ever-steady stream of tears across his face and his heaving chest are indicators that he is still here with Finn.

“Finn”, he finally breathes, and Finn slowly reaches for Poe’s other hand as well, their touch intoxicating.

“I am not in love with Rey”, Finn says then and his own heart is nearly exploding inside of his chest.

There are pain and guilt between them now; Poe’s feelings so clearly visible in the force surrounding them. They keep on starring at each other.

“I thought…”, Poe starts but his sentence breaks off right there. “I am so sorry, Finn. I am such a kriffin asshole. I should not have screamed at you for such a petty reason. I am sorry”, he babbles then, and Finn hates the tension between them; hates how pained Poe’s face still looks.

“Why did that matter, though?”, Finn asks then – he hates to put Poe on this again, but he has to know. Finn has to know.

“What?”

“That you thought I love her. Why did that matter so much?”, Finn asks; his mouth is dry as he watches Poe’s eyes search for anything to hold on to; for his gaze to read anything in Finn’s expression that would give him a clue on what to say now.

“It didn’t matter”, Poe whispers then and Finn raises his eyebrows.

“Poe”

“I am just being stupid”

“Poe!”

“I just thought that she would…”

“POE!”

“And that you would…”

“POE DAMERON!”

“I love you, okay?!”, Poe screams then, and Finn’s heart stops. The whole world stops.

“I am in love with you – have been for a long time – and I thought that you are together and it hurt every single day and I didn’t know what to do because I have never felt such a thing ever before. Not with anyone. And I am afraid that this is what my mom told me about and that I can never have this. Can never be with you”, Poe shouts and Finn’s heart beats with every syllable leaving Poe’s mouth; grows with every silent _I love you_ Poe screams against his face.

“I didn’t plan on telling you like this. I didn’t plan on telling you ever if it would put our friendship in danger, because – Finn”, Poe draws in a shaky deep breath then before he holds onto Finn’s hands with such vigour that Finn forget everything around them, “I don’t think I could ever live without you again”

Finn’s head is spinning and Poe’s grip on his hands is the only thing keeping him stable. He remembers all the smiles they have shares; all the late nights they sat around the fire together; all the laughs they had after a successful mission; the most heartfelt embrace after they had won. He remembers the longing gazes he focused on Poe whenever he took control and tried his best to save everyone; he remembers the softest touches as Poe has helped him with his recovery after his back has been injured. He remembers the drunken nights as they just leaned against one another and Poe has told him stories about his childhood; about his parents; about the feeling he had when he spun with his X-Wing around the air. Finn remembers the moment when he thought he would die on the Finalizer; he remembers that his last thought has been focused on Poe. That his every thought is always focused on Poe; the man that gave him a life; the man that saved him for the first time and that would do everything to save him again.

Finn leans down then and presses his forehead against Poe’s forehead. Their faces are inches apart and their breaths melt; their heartbeats synch and their eyes hold each other’s gaze.

“I am in love with you”, Finn breaths then and Poe leans up to connect their lips.

Their kiss is soft and desperate. Their lips dancing with their shared love; with their shared relieve. Finn’s hands rush around Poe’s waist then and he presses Poe flush against his body. Poe’s hands sneak around Finn’s neck and he twists his head more to intensify their kiss.

Finn’s whole existence is shrunken down to this moment then; his heartbeat seems to surround them; his senses are only focused on the man in his arms. The force is sweeping him off his feet; is pulling their bodies even closer together.

They part after a few moments; both men draw in shaky breaths, but they stay close. Finn’s hand reaches upwards; his finger runs over Poe’s tear-streaked cheeks and Poe blushes as he smiles up towards Finn.

Finn hopes he can burn this moment into his every cell, his every bone.

“I always knew”, Poe mumbles after a few moments.

Finn raises his eyebrow questioningly.

“I always knew that you are special”, Poe’s smile grows even wider and Finn rests his hand against Poe’s cheek, “Jedi-General”, Poe chuckles then and Finn rolls his eyes, “Sounds fucking terrifying to me”

“Force, you know how to destroy a moment, don’t know”, Finn laughs, and Poe bites his lip before he inches up and presses another quick kiss to Finn’s mouth.

“You have to deal with a whole new side of annoying with me now”, Poe grins and Finn hugs him close again; he thinks he will never be able to let him go again.

“Boys”, Rose giggles from where she and Rey are leaning against the wall outside of the conference room.

“They are both so dramatic”, Rey agrees before she leans down and presses a quick kiss against Rose’s cheek, “I would have thought that out of everyone Poe Dameron would have enough gay power to understand that I am so not into boys”, Rey grins and Rose grabs her hand gently.

“He is an idiot, though. You didn’t put that into your calculation, did you?”, Rose says and Rey shrugs her shoulders.

“You are right”

“I always am”, Rose smiles, as they watch Finn and Poe hug at the far end of the corridor; Rey can feel them in the force; Finn can feel her in the force as well.


End file.
